sorry to be heavy, but heavy is the cost

been forever since I last listened to this

It's Tuesday, the second day of the academic year, and I feel like these 11 months are going to go by extremely slowly despite one too many warnings from tutors and lecturers that "time will fly past and you'll be sitting for your A' Levels".

Yeah and I will probably look 44 by the time those dreaded exams are done with.

I had a mini nervous breakdown yesterday but I was too busy being nervous and breaking down (because that's what a nervous breakdown entails right?) to blog about it at that moment, and also because I have no interest in being those obsessive bloggers/tweeters who feel this compelling urge to blog/tweet about every single detail of their insignificant lives, and confuse generic stress-ruts for breakdowns, you know?

And people say you grow less humorous with age. 

So anyway the highly possible reasons pertaining to my breakdown would include the anxiety of having to take my goddamn height and weight the following day, the pile of assignments and holiday revision packages that have magically added up just enough to swamp me, and as usual, the perennial question: WHY AM I NOT LOSING WEIGHT DESPITE EVERYTHING I'M DOING?

By everything I mean regular exercise and clean eating.

and the fact that TDCC is on Friday and I have no outfit to render me attractive enough to score myself a decent guy with good music taste and preferably nice shoes, maybe in brogues and beige and baby blue because that combination pretty much does it for me. Or alternatively he could be in boots and dark jeans and a leather throwover, I would tap that. No, but really, I think gigs are the perfect place to meet someone because I'd really like to be with someone who has similar musical preferences to mine.

Not any guy's going to approve having me walk down the aisle to Bloc Party's Signs you know.

No, but really, I need to conjure up a decent outfit that is practical and stylish although I did swear that practical and stylish can never be in the same sentence except in the ones before. So, I suppose like most times I'd go for the latter, it's not like I'll be jumping and grooving and headbobbing and fistpumping and whatever it is you people do at concerts in stilettos anyway because I don't do heels.

I am craving any form of carbohydrates that does not include oatmeal. Pancakes or pasta or a bowl of tonkotsu ramen with the amazing hanjuku egg. Typing alone is making my mouth water, oh God. I want to quit this torture but new year, new body.

It's going to pay off, it's going to pay off, it's going to pay off, it's going to pay off, it's going to pay off, it's going to pa...