Hey guys, I've moved to www.thegraceinmonsters.wordpress.com!

The new site has got me all excited to post again hehe, it's a nice feeling. I'm going to categorize my posts under poetry and personal so stuff's about to get more organised. See you guys there and thanks for all the love :)

on a scale of 1 to 10 how much does it hurt?

She says,

Smile more

He says,

Look you got to freak out a little less

And I wait

They say if you're quiet enough,

You start to hear your own voice

I can't decide if that's a good thing

He picks me up and I dumb myself down

Rinses me down while I size myself up

Width is still one word I can't say without biting my tongue too much at the end

Workout plan + some advice

Hey guys, gonna post my fitness regime/workout plan here to clear the repeating questions on ask.fm.

If you're wondering about the success rates of it so far, I can't give you a good answer because I've been doing it for a little over a year and it's not like i'm damn shredded now or anything. But it's managed to help me increase my metabolism by loads such that I can do very little cardio and gorge(as seen on my insta) and maintain my size, thanks to weight training. It's just a guideline, add and leave out exercises to your suiting. Cheers!

Just a little legend,

No. of sets x no. of reps

E.g. 5 x 5

Leg day:

5 x 5 barbell back squat(plus 1 warm up set) I suggest y'all push yourselves for this one since it's only 5 reps per set, go for a heavy weight 

5 x 5 conventional deadlift 

3 x 25 weighted lunges(you can either hold dumbbells/plates or place a barbell on your back like how you would do for a squat) 

1 x 25 lunges(without any weight and do it straight after your last set of weighted lunges) 

And that's it for leg day! It seems short but trust me it will kill you if you go hard. You can add in some abs at the end but I don't do that.

Back and shoulders:

4 x 5 conventional deadlift (optional, because this routine is pretty packed so if I did legs a day before I'll omit this exercise)

4 x 8-12 Shoulder press

4 x 8-12 T-bar row

4 x 8-12 upright cable row and cable front raises, SUPERSET(which means you do each set of exercises back to back with no rest in between)

4 x 8-12 seated cable row

4 x 8-12 lateral raises

4 x 8-12 lat pulldown

Arms and chest day:(nowadays I don't train arms because I'm really pressed for time, and usually when you do back, it really works your biceps, and when you do shoulders it works your triceps. As for chest.. I don't really like to train it haha)

4 x 8-10 flat bench press 

4 x 8-12 cable crossovers 

4 x 8-10 close grip bench press/skull crushers 

4 x 8-12 EZ-bar curls/dumbbell curls

4 x 8-12 cable tricep pressdown 

4 x 8-12 hammer curls

4 x 8-10 cable tricep extention(with rope attachment)

Now that we've cleared strength training, for cardio I'll usually try to squeeze in one session a week, usually before leg day because after leg day I really don't wanna move...

I do high intensity interval training(HIIT) and I usually do a tabata style workout from fitnessblender on YouTube! Basically it changes every week, I'll usually search for one that is 20-22min long max, because I 've read in most places that that's the optimum length. Also, if you keep increasing the duration of it, your body's gonna get used to it and it won't be so effective so you should start at 15 and slowly(VERY) move up to 20. 

Alternatively, you can do sprints, but I prefer something I can do my room so HIIT is always my option. 

When time allows me, I'll go for yoga once a week to just take my mind off all the things I have to do, and just devote an hour and a half to practice.

So yeah guys, here you go. You don't have to do everything at once, just start slow :) including exercise in your life doesn't have to take a whole lot of time, as you can see. To all of you who tell yourself you'll only follow the cardio part of my routine cause that's how you'll burn fat, I urge y'all to do some research on the benefits of weight lifting for losing fat in the long run. Cardio may help you lose fat fast but weights will help keep the fat off! Sure at first you may appear a little bigger because muscles are growing underneath your fat but you'll soon shed those fats off, and ultimately, it's a strong and functional body we're looking for, not a 'skinny-fat' one.

Peace!

“If you find yourself asking, “Am I really a writer? Am I really an artist?” chances are you are. The counterfeit innovator is wildly self-confident. The real one is scared to death.”

Steven Pressfield (via roguepostits)

Crispy realization

 I want to unravel in a place like this, our little bed and breakfast is probably down the street on the right. And oh, when we finally get there after a bottle of beer we don't even finish. Wooden steps, splintering and fraying at their edges. Slight musk of old tapestry. Maybe the floral wallpaper's peeling back to reveal its underside. So what if it's the colour of dried out lemons, or if it isn't sticky anymore. I'll leave a note to myself at that exact moment to remember,

remember how we were all once glassy-eyed with a lust for life. And we lose that brilliance bit by boring bit, day by desolate day, but there's still enough to keep these four walls up.

"Stacks" is playing and behind his hazy falsetto we are tumbling over each other's feet, trying to be quiet but the god damn floorboards creak so loud they're competing with my heartbeat in my ears, and fuck, I think it is the sound of my coming undone. I know you'd pull me back together in the morning, not to completion, but to the slightest state of disarray so I am frazzled, heavy-handed, till I find my way back to you again. 

we don't speak in the same tongue

He is so gentle, sometimes I wonder if
he keeps his resolve within clenched
fists he doesn't own
they knock against his teeth sometimes,
how dare he

when the only time I'd go that far is when his jaw points the way
to another all consuming kiss.

I drop hints around his potty mouth,
the feral way I know how, with nicks and tiny licks I show him
possession without manipulation,
oh, the only time I will pin him down is so
every
part
of our bodies can lie in perfect alignment
while your pen is ready to stab him in the flesh,
mine is ready to paint him in the light of day
because,
metaphors jump across the page to coat him in layers of Gold Ochre,
Terre Verte,
Scarlet Lake is the colour of his ears when he laughs at his own bad jokes
But you,
you only know rage the darkest shade of carmine,
call me belligerent but I'm not the one battling my pride

one day I hope you'll find the time
to pull apart your pre-
conceived notions and stubborn skin
the one you wear like chain-mail and brigandine
until then, this is one war I cannot win.

I walk and you are with me

That day in particular 

I remember it was unbelievably hot

I almost swatted a fly against my ear

And my skin was the kind of dry every scratch marred me with chalk white lines on my calves

I was thinking about the wet centre of your mouth 

And that my favourite kind of poetry centered on a reckless coming undone where the only shred of control was the hesitation before the searing rip of buttons

I kicked a can and it rolled with an almost sensual tinkling as it hit a lamppost a tock

Tick, tick, tick,

Plastic buttons fall

to the floor rolling off in different directions 

You, on the other hand,

The perfect epitome of purposeful you sank the only southern way you know how to

And I grip the table's edge

Knuckles white

Lights dancing in my vision even whiter 

Oh, how this body only knows rhythm when it is fed to me through your lips

How the only time I am moved is when you wreak havoc on my nervous system

There are whole nations in your chest cavity 

Where I am stumbling blind quite honestly